Ten Alternative Valentines Ideas

I don’t know about you but personally I’m bored of reading about cute date ideas for valentines (low-key just bitter because lockdown means I can’t see my girlfriend). But anyway, I’ve taken the executive decision to give you all some alternative (slightly anti-valentines) ideas.

1. Burn Your Exes Things

I know I know “valentines is a day to celebrate love” but technically you’re still doing that. You’re celebrating the love you have for yourself by ridding yourself of everything you’ve clung to from your past relationship. I personally would prefer to set some (one) of my exes on fire but apparently that’s frowned upon so burning their things is probably best. I haven’t ever done this, I prefer to go with the classic just rip everything up and bin it tactic and seen as I’ve remained friends with my most recent ex then I actually have nothing to burn this year. But I’m a big advocate for you all doing it. Just imagine how much more dramatic it would be, getting a big make shift fire pit and just watching all those bad memories go up in flames. Sounds pretty cathartic to me. Especially if you have things of theirs they want back. Some would say this is unhealthy and petty, I say add those people to the fire!

*Disclaimer: please remember fire safety comes first and if you burn your house down I’m not to blame, k thanks. Burning actual people is wrong, don’t do it.

2. Spend it with a Grandparent

There is no one in this world I adore more than my Granddad. The man is precious and must be protected at all costs. I know no one ever has a perfect relationship but my Grandparent’s was pretty damn close! They spent their whole lives together so naturally my Granddad was distraught when she passed. We have a habit of not prioritising our Grandparents, we take for granted the fact they won’t always be around. So this valentines I’m suggesting you pick up the phone and spend a few hours chatting away. I love hearing stories of how my Gran and Granddad met and my Granddad loves reminiscing about it so it’s the perfect valentines idea really.

3. Have a Snowball Fight

This past week we’ve had really heavy snow and freezing temperatures so Scotland is looking like a winter wonderland at the moment. If you’re lucky enough to be with your partner in lockdown (or unlucky for you straight couples who seem to low-key hate each other) then why not get outside and start a big old snowball fight. For one, it’s a great laugh and good exercise, two if you do kind of hate your other half then what a great way to release some of that anger! For those of you currently not in snowy places why not just get outside and throw some rocks at each other, I’m sure it’d be just as fun.

4. Games Night

Valentines doesn’t always have to be for love between couples, plenty of people celebrate it as a day for love in general. And who loves you more than your siblings? Who else has the classic “I’m the favourite child!” argument with their sibling? Every month when I send my parents my dig money (this is what we call rent money) I add the reference “Favourite Daughter” purely with the intention of winding up my sister. So after much deliberation I’ve came up with a solution; ultimate game night, where the prize is the title of “Favourite Child”. Great idea right? I’m thinking classic games; a wee quiz about the parents, see who knows the most, then an arts and crafts war because we all know amazing children’s art is the way to a parent’s heart, then we’d do a cook off to see who can provide our parents with the best meal and naturally we’d end it with some form of physical fight because why not? Then at the end we’d add up all the points and one sibling would be crowned “Favourite Child”.

5. Hype Yourself Up

This one is for all those people chilling on their own on valentines. I’ve read loads of really nice posts about spending the day doing self care and while that’s a lovely idea it’s not really my cup of tea. What I think we should be doing is getting the hype we deserve! So throw on your favourite outfit, could be going out clothes, underwear that you look banging in, maybe it’s your favourite onesie? Either way, throw it on, get some good lighting and take some out of this world stunning selfies. Send them to the people in your life you know will hype you up (if you can’t think of anyone I suggest ditching your friends and getting yourself some new ones) with the message “look how stunning I am” and then just wait for the love and hype to roll in. Maybe post them to socials if you know you have a supportive socials group. Either way just make sure you’re getting nothing but LOVE.

6. Tell Me Why You Love Me

You can do this with anyone; a partner, family, friends, your boss. All of these people should love you because you’re amazing, duh! So send them a message and get them to tell you why they love you, of course you’ll have to return the favour as well. For me, I know my family would never do this, we express our love through mockery and sarcasm but I know my two best friends from college would be all over this and ready to go with the love (one would probably hate getting the love back but we’d force it on her anyways).

7. Dedicate the Whole Day to Your Pet

I think this might be my favourite one. My dog is elite. She’s just the cutest thing you’ll ever see and she definitely deserves a day all about her (even though every day already is). Spend the day doing all of your pet’s favourite things. I’ll lay out my day for you; we wake up crazy early, go a nice big walk in the snow and chase all the snowballs, we come in and she gets some people food for breakfast (dog safe of course) we have a glorious wee nap in the sun because we’re divas and we deserve it, then we head on out for more snow fun, we probably go out for about 3/4 hours then we come home and it’s time for the meal of the day; dinner! My dog eats anything (including other dog shit) but she especially loves beef or duck, so we’d choose one of these and cook up a storm for the wee angel. By this point she’d now be all over me wanting to play, so we’d spend a few hours (and I do mean hours) chasing her ball, playing tug o’ war then once she’s finally all tuckered out we’d get cosy and have bedtime snugs. Honestly sounds like the perfect valentines to me.

8. Break Things

For the people out there generally lacking love in their life I have a great solution. Breaking things. I’m sure you’ve all heard of rage rooms and if you haven’t give them a Google. The whole premise is going in with a weapon of choice and smashing things. For some of us we aren’t lucky with love, maybe we come from bad families, we’ve had a string of bad relationships or we attract friends who don’t really care about us. Either way we just don’t feel the love and don’t want to spend the day celebrating it. So instead, grab some protective goggles (cause safety first) select your weapon, I’m thinking baseball bat, golf clubs, a big stick and just start smashing up all the stuff in your life you don’t need any more. This is also a great way to do a clear out and have fun with it.

*Disclaimer: please only smash your own belongings, I’m not trying to have anyone arrested here.

9. Do Nothing

Again, if you really just hate valentines this one’s for you. Shut the curtains, turn off your phone so you don’t see all the mushy love posts, get yourself cosy with snacks and drinks, find some Netflix shows not about love and just spend the whole day doing sweet FA.

10. Sex, Sex, Sex!

If you’re a woman in a relationship with a man, maybe give this one a miss, there’s only so many times you want to be disappointed in one day. For the rest of us, crack on! If you’re with your partner at the moment then why not just spend the whole day butt naked all over each other. Forget the presents and fancy meal; just spend the day having sex, maybe throw in some time for a takeaway later on. Turn the phones off, leave the films and TV alone, just spend some genuine quality time together.

So there you go my top ten alternative valentines ideas. Personally I think they’re all absolutely brilliant and outstanding (much like myself) but if you disagree that’s fine, I’ll just add you to the fire pit!

54 thoughts on “Ten Alternative Valentines Ideas

Add yours

      1. Great list! I especially love the one about spending time with your grandparents. My grandfather passed away back in October and I’d do anything to talk to him today. These are all great ideas to keep you busy though!

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Love these ideas, especially the burn your exs things haha! Very unique and if i had any exs things i might’ve actually done it! Love the dedicate the day to your pets, my doggos deserve all the love!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I particularly loved the breaking stuff and sex all day tips! Haha great post. I love how these tips ultimately focus on self love and places priority on what a person feels best doing on a day that can be a drag for many. Thank you for sharing!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. This is the best list of suggestions ever, I was cracking up reading this! I’ll be having a games night and dinner with my flatmates and have treated myself to some new lingerie just to check myself out because why not

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Great suggestions! Burning your exes things and letting go of the past is a great way to show yourself a little love, plus it’s fun. But my absolute favourite suggestion here is dedicating the whole day to your pet. That sounds like a perfect day to me. Thanks for sharing!

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  4. Excellent! I thought this was going to be another post full of over sentimental ideas but these are great. I’ll happily go for Games Night, Day with my pet or nothing … but would have happily burnt any exes things had most most recent ex not been over 26 years ago … or spent it with grandparents were they still with us.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Haha, absolutely amazing take on how V-day should be spent. You had me at burn all your ex’s things, but the final point is great too.

    Too bad I’m single, or I’d do some of these. But the selfie one isn’t a bad option either – I can do like my own personal photoshoot of wholesome pictures! lol

    Liked by 1 person

  6. 😂 Positively love this! I connect with breaking or burning things; some people may say that is an unhealthy way to let emotions out but sometimes it is the way we need. Also love the idea of spending the day with grandparents. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Breaking stuff she sex all day are my favorites on the list! Haha I love how these tips ultimately places focus on self love, especially because Valentine’s Day may be a drag for some people. Thanks for sharing!

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    1. Hahaha, they’re popular ones for sure! I know plenty people love Valentine’s Day for all the couple stuff but I think it’s nice to remember that love comes from many other places!

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  8. Okay, you cracked me up all the way with the disclaimers! I truly enjoyed reading this! As you said we never spend enough time with our grandparents and would truly love to see them, but can’t really travel right now.
    The burning and breaking things look like a great option! Thanks for sharing x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahaha so glad to hear! I’m the same, I can’t see my grandad so will have to settle for a wee phone-call this year! I’m glad I’ve brought people on board with breaking things haha!

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  9. Haha I love this! But also, there’s some good advice – love can be celebrated in lots of different ways, so why not platonically celebrate a family member, or pet, or yourself? (plus, you can celebrate yourself romantically too)

    Liked by 1 person

  10. This post put a huge smile on my face and made me laugh! I agree though sometimes it is nice to switch things up- and it is great to have alternative ideas. I have actually in the past with my friends done the break things and it was brilliant!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. If you’re a woman in a relationship with a man, maybe give this one a miss, there’s only so many times you want to be disappointed in one day – oh my god, i am literally crying with laughter. I loveeee this post! I feel like I’ve read so many copies of the same post and (while good) i don’t need any more stay in date night ideas LOL – love this. searching up rage rooms now! xx

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Haha loved this post, you had me laughing all the way through. I’m married but we don’t bother with Valentine’s Day, it’s literally pointless. Maybe I should dedicate today to my dog though, that’s a good idea!

    Liked by 1 person

  13. This was such a fun post with some great ideas! I love the suggestion of spending the day with grandparents!! Thanks so much for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

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